I have been watching the TV-Show Hoarders online. I understand how these people get where they are, I really do. I am not a hoarder.....do have a lot of stuff(too much), but not a hoarder. However I do get how these people get to the point of not seeing it and when they do, they freeze and do not know even where to start. I have had this behavior(not seeing things and freezing) before I found out I had ADHD. I came to a point not long before I found out I had ADHD that there was something wrong with me. DH and I hardly ever fight or have many arguments, but the ones I do recall always had to do with our household. When he said something about it, it always was like my eyes were opened again, because I didn't see it, until he started about it, which made me feel ashamed, guilty and also defensive. I promised to do more my best and I went for it. I focused on doing the whole house and sorting things out for one week and most of the time it worked. But after that week my concentrating/focus was gone and life went on like before, until the next argument about the same thing.
I told a friend: I do not know what it is but I just can't seem to do it. I get overwhelmed when I see to much and I just sit down and turn on the tv or read a book, instead of undertaking action. I just couldn't do it. Not too much later I found out I had ADHD and all fell into place. Two years have past now and I can honestly say I am in a better place right now. Not yet where I would like to be, but I feel like I made some good steps into a new direction.
We are cleaning and clearing out our house now step by step. I had too many little items everywhere which gave rooms a busy look. I have given and thrown away a lot already so our living room looks already so much calmer than before, just like our hallway that I gave a make-over. We also decided to build a game-room for our kids in our shed(schuur)(do you call it like that?). It is from bricks already and we need to have an extension from our house to the shed. The kids can play there and hang out with their friends and the toys we have in the living room are no longer in sight :)
I need to make out house look calmer so I can be calmer in my head also, so far it is working.
Okay, coming back to the TV-show, I do understand these people and I find it so sad that other people call on them instead of offering their help. Children are taking away by the authority's and suffer even more. Why don't the authority's offer these people help? I guess it is with a lot of things like this, taking away the problem instead of doing something about it. It makes me sad.
Right now I am sitting in my scraproom and I cleared it out twice and still feel like I need to clear it out once or twice because it still is too much. Dropped off 5 moving-boxes at Anthony his school today and his teacher screamed off delight when she opened them, which made me smile in return :).
We also are re-doing Jadenn's room and so far his wall's are painted, he has a new bed and we ordered a new closet that will arrive in two weeks time. Cleared out his toys that can go to other kids, which also makes his room look so much better already.
So far I feel like I am on the right track and finally DH and I are on the same track with this, so I have a good feeling we will get everything done the way we want it to be by the end of this year. When i think off all the things we still need to do it is very overwhelming, therefor I like to take it step by step and focus on one thing at a time.