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February 13, 2007

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Marie Starr

First of all, I am so excited for you and your new Cosmic Energy paperline:

Second: Here is something funny:
Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem that more and more that physicians are running their practices like an assembly line? Here's what happened to Bubba: Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said, Shingles. So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Bubba what he had.
Bubba said, Shingles. So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told Bubba to wait in the examining room. A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, Shingles. So the nurse gave Bubba a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Bubba to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, shingles. The doctor asked, Where?
Bubba said, "Outside on the truck. Where do you want them?"

Sharon L

Haha! Some of these are so funny...sadly I cannot come up with anything quite as funny...However, I have an abundance of blonde jokes cause my hubby is blonde...One day a police officer caught a car racing by...he sped up and got next to it and saw that the blonde driver was actually knitting!!! She was totally oblivious to his siren and flashing lights. He rolled down his window and yelled, "PULL OVER!!"...She looked back and yelled, "NO, IT'S A SCARF!!" :)

Robyn

I just had to tell you that your paper line is fabulous! Love the fun colors! So delicious!!

Ok - my kids are all about knock,knock jokes so here it goes...

Knock, Knock...
Who's there?
Nobody
Nobody Who?
(((((silence)))))

They laugh every single time! Sillies! :)

jen

My daughter of three and I were at Walmart. She had to go potty, now I never use the restrooms in public, but had no choice this time. So I go into the bathroom, she goes, and then I decide that I might as well go since I am already there and I have already cleaned the seat for dd. Suddenly my dd asks me very loudly, "Mommy, why do you have a string in your butt?" To my horror, several woman begin to snicker in the next few stalls. It was infact that *time of month.* Needless to say, I stayed in the stall until I was sure the other woman had left the restroom. At the time is was not so funny, but now I think it is hilarious.

Nat

oh boy - sorry, I'm German...I'm not funny!

Maite

Hey Corinne! :) Here is my joke:
The blonde goes to the computer store and tells the salesman that she wants to buy pink curtains for her computer monitor. The salesman has no idea why, so he asks: why do you think you need curtains for your computer monitor? The blonde looks at him and says: "helloooo, it's got Windows!" :)

charity hassel

while giving my dd a bath the other night my son came in the bathroom. He's 21/2. He looked at his sister and said "Mommy, she doesn't have a peepee like me!" I said "No, she doesn't." Then, in a very concerned voice he said "You gotta go get her one Mommy!".

thea

okee, ready for a laugh..
i'am a kindergartenteacher and one day a mother told me this story:
Boy greets his parents after there trip to Paris. It was the first time they were on a trip together since theire children were born. So the boy asks: were you naked all day? (sorry!!!!!!! he is 4 years old)
parents starts blussing (krijgen een rode kop) nooo of course not (uhm of toch wel?) Why do you ask?
Well my teacher says that everybody is naked in the paradise (in dutch paradijs (lijkt op parijs))....
I really laughed my heart out about this one and hope you will too.
love thea

Suzanne

OK, I'm drawing a blank at the moment on anything funny. But I recently made a layout that has a photo of my daughter (who is absolutely hilarious) pretending to be a rock star and everytime I see this photo, I can't help but laugh. So here's the link http://playcreateshare.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/lil_rock_star.jpg

ania

Haha marvelous collection of funny jokes and stories :)

Would love a chance too, so here's my joke:

Why Parents Go Gray

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his
employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper,

"Hello."

"Is your daddy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with him?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss
asked, "Is your mommy there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a
message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"

"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's
home,the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy", whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the
whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what
sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The
search team just landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned, and even more then just a little
frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a
muffled giggle: "ME."

mireille

A little story about the whale and the mermaid..

Once upon a time there was this little girl. She was absolutely gorgeous and shining with cosmic energy. Her mother on the other hand was far that and could definately use some.. well.. energy would be great.. cosmic energy even better.

http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a162/AmberMireille/dewalvisendezeemeermin.jpg I hope you can take a look at this pic.. remember the "good old times" .. take a look in the mirror.. and smile.. and be happy with how dayum good you look girl!!!


=))))))))

PS. I hope.. in a year or 2.. maybe 3.. to have "your looks again"
;)

Rhonda

This always makes me laugh. Its Ariel trying to learn to Hula Hoop

http://s9.photobucket.com/albums/a98/Rhondabrown/?action=view&current=IM000002.flv?t=1171391576

Stacey M

I think this one is so funny and it fits perfectly with the signs of the times!!!

A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:

"You've Got Male"

Carol

True story
My friends little girl Erica goes to school for the first time. She is 7. She comes home with her books covered in brown paper and pictures cut from magazines. One of the books had to have animals on the cover. Her mom had to cover over these books in plastic and while they were doing this Erica asked her mom 'what kind of animal is this' In fact is was not an animal but a sp..rm cell complete with little tail
I thought this was hysterical

Corinne

Hoi Corinne,

Ik heb een zoontje van 2 die momenteel heel erg veel nieuwe woorden en zinntjes aan het leren/zeggen is. We zaten net aan het avondeten: aardappels met broccoli. Hij kijkt op zijn bord en zegt ineens: Thomas boom eten en trekt daarbij een gezicht alsof hij dacht dat zijn moeder even de kluts was kwijtgeraakt. Jammergenoeg heb ik geen foto van zijn gezicht, maar wij lagen in een deuk!

Groetjes!
...... ook Corinne

Lynda

Dropping off my girls at school this morning instead of my husband and someone asked my oldest dd where her Papa was. Her interpretation of his conversation with her a few days ago: He's on vacation...he wanted to get away from us...even went on a plane. He'll be back when he's good and plenty.

The truth: He's on a work trip planned at the last minute...he said he needed to go; did not want to get away from his family at all (did fly, so she got that part right) and he'll be home as soon as his work is done and the project is ready.

Man...I could only imagine what they would have been thinking if I wasn't there to fill in the gaps!

Love that little girl! Lynda

Marjolein

And what if I don't have a funny story or joke, but........ a really good tasting Blueberrie Oatmeal Streusel Pie...... if you want a piece...... drop by here:-)
http://dutchie-in-canada.blogspot.com/2007/02/blueberry-oatmeal-streusel-bars.html

Serai

op de eerste plaats is het natuurlijk super dat je je eigen lijn hebt!!! en ik wil ook een kansje wagen, dus hier dan mijn verhaal. ;)

ik ben samen met mijn zoontje Levi spruitjes schoon aan het maken. Hij haalt wat blaadjes eraf en ziet dat ik er elke keer het kontje vanaf snij en een kruisje erin maak. En dan geeft hij mij weer een gepeld spruitje en zegt 'hier mama, nu mag jij zijn kontje afvegen'. als ik eraan denk krijg ik nog elke keer een glimlach op mijn gezicht.

Jetty

Oh boy,so many funny stories already, but here is mine.
My three year old son is almost going to school,and he can't wait. For me is it a little hard, my last baby is going to school every day. So i said to him that he has to stay so little as he is now and that he has to stay at home with me. He laught and said, no mam, i am going to school and you gone pick me up just as Rutger and Wichard (his older brothers) every time. Okay i said but what can i do while you are at school. He looked at me and said oh, you can clean the house.

monique helfrich

WOW, what a FUN way to go for a RAK!!! Love to read all those funny stories and look at the youtubes :)
Today we had a fun story in the house! In Dutch:

Wouter gaf ons een demonstratie van wat hij allemaal op school leert met de EHBO lessen zoals stabiele zijligging, verbinden van vingers of hand en ook het vakkundig wegslepen van (bewusteloze) Ivo. Als ik hem vraag wanneer hij dit moet doen, antwoordt hij "Elke maandag"!

heppie 'm?

Lisa

Okay, I can't decide between these two:

I was in the stage production of Disney's Beauty and the Beast, touring around the States. At one point in the show, Gaston gets all the townspeople together and says, "The Beast will make off with your children-- he'll come after them in the night!" However, one performance, what he said was, "The Beast will MAKE OUT with your children! He'll come after them in the night!" Well, of course, we were all trying so hard not to laugh, and tears were rolling down our faces!

The other story is from a friend of mine who is also an actress. She was going to an audition and had her two little daughters with her. They were in the car getting all buckled in, and her daughter said, "Mummy, why are you wearing red lipstick?" "The lady I'm playing wears red lipstick", she replied. Her daughter thought for a moment, then said, "Does the lady your playing have bad breath, too?"

Hee hee!
Lisa

Danielle Muit

Hihi I feel a little bit "spuit 11" as there are so many funny stories before me. But I think this RAK is so nice and funny and your paperline is so great that I decided to give it a try too ;-)

In Dutch: ik als provinciaaltje uit Alphen aan den Rijn een dagje in Amsterdam. Ik heb zin in een milkshake....vraagt de verkoper: "een grote of een kleine" (lees dit in zo plat mogelijk Amsterdams ;-) en mijn antwoord was: "aardbeien" (in mijn onschuld)

Revlie

okay, i guess i have to stick to the childrens'story also... one story always makes me smile. the story about me making a stuffed animal that didn't look at all like it should be. I made a layout of it:
http://twopeasinabucket.kaboose.com/pg.asp?cmd=display&layout_id=1068073

and if you want to laugh of silly girls talk, check this layout:
http://twopeasinabucket.kaboose.com/pg.asp?cmd=display&layout_id=1010607
Sanne was just rambling on and on and on, and Arjan and I couldn't stop laughing. Hope it makes you smiles (why is it hard to get you to smile though??) You always are a happy girl?

and just one last one. but it's only funny in Dutch (sorry girls :)
Arjan: ik ga me scheren.
Sanne tegen mij: papa gaat zich schillen, dat kán toch helemaal niet??? hij is toch geen sinaasappel???!! en ligt helemaal in een deuk.

Heerlijk toch, hoe kinderen uit de hoek kunnen komen.

O, en nog een beetje eentje om me te schamen, vandaar ook maar in het Nederlands. Ik heb een knalharde scheet gelaten toen ik in een boekenwinkel in de rij ging staan!!! Yep, ik ben zwanger en NEE ik voelde niets aankomen. Uiteraard deed ik net of mijn neus bloedde, maar de mensen in de rij keken wel benauwd om.... het stonk niet hoor :)

Suc6 girl!!
xoxo
Rev

Kayla Wilcoxson

This is a layout I scraplifted from a Bazzill advertisement in one of the CK's. It's a story I had to scrap although I'm sure it's a lot funnier to those of us who were there. Your mind just works differently at 3am.

After spend a long day and night decorating the church for my best friend Charity’s wedding last july all of us bridesmaids finally made it back to Melissa’s house and climbed into bed around 3 am. Exhausted, we turned off the lights and settled in for the night until 30 seconds later we heard a creepy little voice call,

“Happy Halloween!”

Completely freaked out we all jumped out of bed and started franticly looking for the source of the voice. 45 somewhat delirious minutes later we discovered a stuffed ghost at the bottom of a Rubbermaid tub under Kimi’s bed. Evidently when she got into bed her weight pressed on the lid of the tub and set off the ghost. We banished the ghost to the kitchen for the rest of the weekend and it took us another 45 minutes or so to settle down enough to go to sleep because we all kept bursting out laughing.

Sonja

Honden kunnen niet praten maar wel hardop denken!!!

Afgelopen vrijdag moest ik met mijn hondje Scooby Doo naar de dierenarts omdat hij constant mank loopt. De conclusie van de dokter was duidelijk: Hij is te zwaar en moet aan de lijn, nog de helft van zijn eten en geen tussendoortjes. Nou loop ik niet mank maar moet ook echt aan de lijn, dus samen met de hond dan maar. Gisteravond had ik zo'n trek in iets zoets na mijn eten dat ik een evergreen heb genomen (gezond toch ?!?!). Tegen Scooby, die voor me zat te kwijlen, zij ik "nee, je hebt al een te dikke kont" en ik zweer je dat hij hardop dacht "en jij niet soms!!!!"

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