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February 13, 2007

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Alana M

I took Calvin to dance class last week and he was taking forever to get out of the car. I said "Come on, while we are still young." And finally got out, looked at me funny, and said "Mom, I wouldn't exactly call you young."

Rascal...

Marlene C.

My story is funny now but at the time I didn't think so. It was a few years ago and I had went to pick up a few things at the grocery store. I went in one store and noticed people were looking at me strange but I couldn't figure out why. I left that store and went across the street to another grocery store and proceeded to walk up and down the aisles and once again noticed several people looking at me strangely. Well I went back home and was in the kitchen putting the groceries away when my daughter-in-law came in to help me. Then she says "mom, how come you have on 2 different color of shoes?" I look down and here I have on one black shoe and one turquoise one, no wonder people were looking at me strange.

Kim

hmmmmmm. this is a tough one. I love to laugh so this should be easy - nothing is coming to mind! ok I just thought of an email my grandma sent to me the other day that made me lol. See below...

"The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a" honk if
you love Jesus "bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day
because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a
thunderous prayer meeting. So I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
Boy am I glad I did, what an uplifting experience that followed.

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection. Just lost in thought
about the Lord and how good he is, and didn't notice that the light had
changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't
honked I'd never have noticed. I found that lot of people love Jesus.

While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and
then he leaned out of his window and screamed, for the love of God! Go! Go!

What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!

Everyone started honking! I just leaned out my window and started waving
and smiling at all those loving people. I even honked my horn a few time to
share in the love!

There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him
yelling something about a sunny beach.

I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up
in the air. I asked, my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that
meant. He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well,
I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him
the good luck sign right back. My grandson burst out laughing. Why even he
was enjoying this religious experience! A couple of the people were so
caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and
started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I
attended, but this is when I noticed the light ;had changed again.

So I waved at all my brothers and sisters grinning, and drove on through the
intersection. I noticed that I was the only car that got through the
intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had
to leave them after all the love we had shared so I slowed the car down,
leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last
time as I drove away."

Marjorie

OMG... I really want this paper!!! It is awesome, now to come up with something funny! OK... here is a little something that always makes me giggle:

One particular four-year-old prayed,
"And forgive us our trash baskets
as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."

No? That did not work?? What about this one:

Husband: When I get mad at you, you never fight back.

How do you control your anger?

Wife: I clean the toilet bowl.

Husband: How does that help?

Wife: I use your toothbrush.

Have a great day!

Marge

Jamie Gavin

My girls are in love with the movie How to Eat Fried Worms. Well in the movie the two brothers are riding their bikes, the older brother starts shaking the younger brothers bike. The younger brother speaks up and says. "Stop Shaking my bike your hurting my dilydank. THe older brother looks at him qith a question sort of look the younger brother states, my dilydank is my peanuts.....So the moral of the story, we were at Dairy Queen on Saturday. We advised our children 4 and 6 that they could have a cone or a "Dilly Bar"......Needless to say they both busted up laughing and told the person helping us that they wanted a dilydank......... he he he

Lea Lawson

Okay...this is a true story, but is so funny. My little brother is 11 years younger than me, and I used to watch him a lot when I was in high school. One day, my best friend and I were watching him for an afternoon. He had been out roller blading on our sidewalk. He fell down and skinned his arm. He came in whimpering a bit. So, I cleaned up his arm downstairs, and then sent him up to get a band aid- that was what he liked to do. He had been upstairs for quite awhile, so I called for him to come down. He came down the stairs with something behind his back. He looked at me with the biggest smile ever and said, "Sissy, I found the BIGGEST band-aid EVER!" Then he whipped out one of my mom's maxi pads, totally proud that he had found this awesome band aid. I snatched it from his hand, and trying not to laugh hysterically (which my best friend was doing), told him that it wasn't a band aid. Of course, he then asked what it was. Not knowing what to tell him, all I said was to ask mom. Then I walked with him back upstairs to get him a real band aid. I am SO glad that I wasn't around for the conversation he had with my mom!

Hugs...have a great day!

Christine Traversa

I think there is so much humor in the cute things kids say.

Recently, we went to a restaurant for dinner, and when our food arrived, my youngest turned to the server, in the most serious voice and face, and asked "Do you have any checkup?". I wasn't sure what she was trying to say, but, fortunately, the server knew she was asking for ketchup.

Another time, she asked a server for a glass of Cokesi.
(she combined Pepsi and Coke..hehe).

We also have been working on counting to 100. I explained to her when looking at numbers on a chart and identifying them, look to the first number first, for a clue. Such as 44, she called this four and four, which made her realize it's forty four. This was working great, for a while, until we got to 22, also known as tooty two.

:-)

Marguerita

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbXLIniGz24 This movie about Crafty Women REALLY REALLY REALLY made me laugh, enjoy the watch!

Ellemieke

A little conversations between my oldest daughter and me the other day:

Lisanne: Mom, I'd like to go to Queen Beatrix and drink a cup of coffee with her.
Me: Oh darling, that would be nice, but it's very difficult to visit her.
Lisanne: Why mom?
Me: Because she is the Queen and she is protected by bodyguards and the police. You're not allowed to visit her.
Lisanne: But what about the princesses, can they visit her? Can Prinses Maxima drink a cup of coffee with her?
Me: Yes, the princesses can.
Lisanne: But mom, daddy always tells me that I am a princess.........

And what about this one? (Have to write it in Dutch, as I don't know the English translation)

Lisanne: Mama, hoe oud ben jij?
Ik: ik ben 35.
Lisanne: Oh, dat is helemaal nog niet oud. Weet je wie er oud zijn? Opa en oma, die zijn STOKoud!!

En nog eentje om het af te leren:
Lisanne: Mama, ik vind het zo jammer voor jou dat Oma Marion er niet meer is......maar gelukkig heb je nog Oma Carla, dat is je schoonmaakmoeder......

Groetjes,
Ellemieke

Ellemieke

A little conversations between my oldest daughter and me the other day:

Lisanne: Mom, I'd like to go to Queen Beatrix and drink a cup of coffee with her.
Me: Oh darling, that would be nice, but it's very difficult to visit her.
Lisanne: Why mom?
Me: Because she is the Queen and she is protected by bodyguards and the police. You're not allowed to visit her.
Lisanne: But what about the princesses, can they visit her? Can Prinses Maxima drink a cup of coffee with her?
Me: Yes, the princesses can.
Lisanne: But mom, daddy always tells me that I am a princess.........

And what about this one? (Have to write it in Dutch, as I don't know the English translation)

Lisanne: Mama, hoe oud ben jij?
Ik: ik ben 35.
Lisanne: Oh, dat is helemaal nog niet oud. Weet je wie er oud zijn? Opa en oma, die zijn STOKoud!!

En nog eentje om het af te leren:
Lisanne: Mama, ik vind het zo jammer voor jou dat Oma Marion er niet meer is......maar gelukkig heb je nog Oma Carla, dat is je schoonmaakmoeder......

Groetjes,
Ellemieke

Sue

Ooooohhhh I love this paper :) Big congrats to you!!!

A funny video I saw recently is here - can people really be this dumb - yep!!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=3f_7ZSQ3or4

Heather

here's a joke for you, my 5 year old son tells it wonderfully

two muffins are sitting in the oven
the first muffin says "is it just me, or is it getting really hot in here"
the second muffin, shocked and scared, says "arrrgghhh!!! a talking muffin!!!"

love your new stuff, love the colors and design. i have 3 boys and 1 girl, will definitely be getting some the first chance i get!!

Jen

There are some funny ones here but here's mine...

I was having a bedtime conversation with my 6 year old a few weeks ago about counting sheep and how it helps you fall asleep sometimes. We said our prayers and blessings then he proceeds to say....

Baaaaamen! instead of amen;o)

True story, I swear. Out of the mouth of babes!

Kath

You may get a laugh out of this....it almost made me cry, lol.

You know how "they" (and who are "they" anyway?) say a watched pot never boils? "They're" almost right! I'm standing in front of my coffee pot...willing it to hurry up so I could enjoy a cup before my rambunctious 3 1/2 y.o. wakes up.

It f-i-n-a-l-l-y finishes...I reach for the pot...and promptly poured it down the drain!!!! Argggghhhhh!!! Why did I DO that????

I turn to start making a fresh batch, chiding myself the entire time for being so dang tired...and who do I see? My little guy...awake and asking me, "Want to play wrestling?". Why can't coffee be delivered????

emily

Okay this isn't so much funny as it is cute (to me at least!!)

I teach first gaders music. This was the conversation between us:
Student: Hey Mrs. S. Did you know that I have a crush on Madelyn?
Me: Really? Which Madelyn?
Student: Madelyn Fox. She rides my bus. I think she might be a second grader!!!
Me: Oh no...she's a first grader, I know her.
Student: You do??????
Me: Yup. So are you going to give her a Valentine?
Student: A Valentine? I didn't think of that. I am thinking about about giving her one of my sister's necklaces.
Me: Oh really? Does your sister know about that?
Student: Not yet. I didn't decide if I like her enough yet.

Dena

Here is a typical Zoe story... Life with a readhead LOL

We went to Coldstone Creamery the other day for icecream. She and I were sitting at the table while John was paying at the counter. John puts a tip in the tip bucket. The two girls working at the counter start singing some silly song and when it was done Zoe looks up at the girl and says whilst rolling her eyes "HOW ANNOYING WAS THAT?! I am trying to eat my icecream here!"

5 going on 15 I tell ya!


Just gotta say Corinne, that I am soo proud of you and what you have accomplished. You are crazy talented and it is good to see you going so far! Have a great day girl!

nicky

well, this story (true or not, don't know) made me laugh out so loud...
chrissy: when school is out, my new daddy comes pick me up!
alan: can I see him?
chrissy: sure...
(school is out, they run to the gates) chrissy: that's my new daddy, in that white shirt, alan!
alan: ow, he's fun! we've had him too!!!

Cynthia

Ok, here is my story... I'm sorry, but it has to be in dutch or else it won't be as funny..

Ik was gisteren mijn 4 jaar oude zoontje aan het uitkleden en zag een wondje op zijn been. Ik vroeg aan hem; "thomas, hoe kom je aan dat wondje?"hij gaf als antwoord (bloedserieus!) Ja mam, ik weet het niet.. ik denk dat ik mij per ongeluk geschaafd heb en toen een scheurtje in mijn SCHIL kreeg..

*proest*

hilde janbroers

ik doe het even in het nederlands, anders komt het niet over ;-)

Ik vond pas een oude schoolkrant van mij. Die had mijn moeder in mijn tekeningenmap gestopt. Daarin stonden allemaal uitspraken van de kleuters ( waaronder ik). Ik moest van de juf het kerstverhaal navertellen.....en middenin het verhaal vertelde ik vol enthousiasme
"Jozef en Maria reden op de ezel naar Betlehem. 'Kijk Maria! Daar ligt Bethlehem! Gaan we nu snel naar de HOOIberg toe!!' ( ipv herberg natuurlijk...)----zie je het voor je? Jozef en Maria cosy in de hooiberg?? ;-)

Marie Starr

I am so excited about your Cosmic Energy paperline!

Here is something quite funny:
Those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem that more and more that physicians are running their practices like an assembly line? Here's what happened to Bubba:

Bubba walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said, Shingles. So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, Shingles. So she wrote down his height, weight, a
complete medical history and told Bubba to wait in the examining room.
A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba
said, Shingles. So the nurse gave Bubba a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Bubba to take off all his clothes
and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, shingles. The doctor asked, Where?
Bubba said, "Outside on the truck. Where do you want them?

I laughed at it anyway!

Christi

This is a true story. It helps to know that children are born Red Sox fans here in the Boston area.

My friend MaryAnn and I were at AC Moore with her daughter who is not quite 3.

She was in the stroller and looked like she was deep in thought.

So I knelt down next to her and asked, “Hey Bean, what are you thinking about?” And she looked right at me and said, “Big Papi”
(meaning David Ortiz, the Red Sox slugger
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Ortiz)
Yup! Told you children are born Red Sox fans around here.

hilde janbroers

ik doe het even in het nederlands, anders komt het niet over ;-)

Ik vond pas een oude schoolkrant van mij. Die had mijn moeder in mijn tekeningenmap gestopt. Daarin stonden allemaal uitspraken van de kleuters ( waaronder ik). Ik moest van de juf het kerstverhaal navertellen.....en middenin het verhaal vertelde ik vol enthousiasme
"Jozef en Maria reden op de ezel naar Betlehem. 'Kijk Maria! Daar ligt Bethlehem! Gaan we nu snel naar de HOOIberg toe!!' ( ipv herberg natuurlijk...)----zie je het voor je? Jozef en Maria cosy in de hooiberg?? ;-)

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